That being said- I need to be real for a moment and say there have been numerous times I have second guessed whether we're stupid for staying put! Self-doubt is my worst enemy! All the unknowns that surround the Ethiopia program have rightfully so, triggered several families to leave the program and pursue other avenues of adoption. In fact, several of these families are my closest friends in the adoption world that I have come to love and treasure their friendships. Hear me when I say, each one of these families has their own unique story of how the Holy Spirit has undoubtedly prompted them to go a different route. I want to be very clear in saying we, 100%, support their decision and trust that God is leading the way in each of their stories to their children! My point is, when I look around me and so many people are "jumping ship" and I'm staying put- I start to wonder if maybe I didn't get the memo from God to change course. Make sense?
Trust me when I say, I've had many nightly chats with God about the fact that I need Him to just shoot me straight and be blatantly clear stressing the fact that I'm not good at subtle signs. The hubs and I have prayed for God's direction during the past couple months more times then I can count and I want to assure you that we are whole heartedly pursuing His will for our family! At this point we simply feel like God is telling us, "Stay put". The other reoccurring answer when we pray for His direction is, "Wait on Uganda.". Hmmm... Now you're probably asking yourself, "Uganda?" As many of you might recall though, Joshua is heading to Uganda at the end of July on a mission trip with our church and while I'm confident that God is going to do big things in and through the team while they're there- I have no idea why, "Wait on Uganda" continues to be an answer to prayer when we're begging for direction. I'm not even sure the two answers correspond with one another?
Our hearts are burdened for getting Isa home all the while we're burdened for Africa and feeling the tug of the Holy Spirit to "go" at some point down the road. So, I can speculate all day long on the different things I think "Wait on Uganda" means- but that just leaves room for me to get in the way of Him. And so, I simply trust. For now, we stay put with the Ethiopia program unless it comes to a halt and we would reevaluate what to do at that point. And... We wait on Uganda- for whatever reason.
Below are some solid truths I've found myself returning to and rereading from a study I did last year called, Discerning the Voice of God by Priscilla Shirer. Seriously... excellent study that I would highly recommend! I'm praying for clarity to distinguish the difference between my voice and God's voice... I liked what these key point had to say. I hope they speak to you too!
"He sees the end from the beginning and seeks to guide us through this life."
"We can be free from the burden of trying to make things happen when we know He promises to fulfill His own Word."
The Holy Spirit leads me PERSONALLY and INDIVIDUALLY.
"Scripture commands specific obedience of all believers on some matters. Some areas, however change based on the individual and what the Lord wants to accomplish in her life. In these instances the Holy Spirit will "call us by name," giving us detailed directions tailored to our lives."

I absolutely love that last quote -- really explains it well! Praying for you...
ReplyDeletelove this... read that book on my way to Zambia... ;)
ReplyDeleteSounds like God is definitely speaking to you during this time -- may your ears and heart continue to be open to Him!
ReplyDeletePraying for you friend! I love that you are seeking what He desires above all. He'll honor your faith! Love the new fonts too :)
ReplyDeleteI really hope that isn't going to be the case for you all! I'll be praying extra hard for you and Josh. Often it seems that just when we think we're certain, God throws us a curve ball. I'm praying for discernment, and understanding in whatever God has planned. Are you still considering full time mission work? Is it possible to do it in Ethiopia if you found out it really WILL take as long as they propose? Thanks for following my new blog...it's not much right now. I have used yours and several other people's to get an idea about what include in it. I've got a long way to go. It takes sooo much more time for all the little details than I thought it would!
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